Effective Ways You Can Do To Deal With Bullies

Effective Ways You Can Do To Deal With Bullies

Bullying is currently one of the main factors why most children and teenagers question their self-worth. That is because being bullied and repetitively getting bullied over the same thing changes the way we see ourselves. Often, we lose the confidence we have built over the years due to the toxic trait that this particular bully and a toxic person has been showing to you.

Once this kind of treatment prolonged, we will end up thinking that we are not good enough to be part of a group, or maybe we are a failure that we do not event deserve our family and friends. This will also lead us not to believe those who try to lift our moods because the damage that your toxic friends have caused you was already massive enough to lose your trust in yourself and other people. 

Being bullied can also eventually make you question the good things in you, and it moves you away from the people who understand you. Bullying does change you, and it already evolved as this does not only occurs to children but in some workplaces, too.

But this kind of relationship should not make you forget your worth as a human. You must also realize how healthy relationships can contribute to a happy and healthy ageing. That way, you will be brave enough to learn how to deal with them.

 

  1. What is Bullying?
  2. Why Do They Bully Other People?
  3. What To Do With The Bullies

What is Bullying?

What is Bullying

According to stopbullying.gov, Bullying is “unwanted, aggressive behaviour among school-aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behaviour is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Both kids who are bullied and who bully others may have serious, lasting problems.”

This does not only involve physical and verbal abuse, but the toxic trait can also cause long-term emotional and mental damage, which can lead the bullied to develop mental health disorders like depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic disorder.

Bullying is not a once in a lifetime abuse, instead, a toxic person or your toxic friends purposely hurt you more than once and over and over again.

There are two most common bullying which can contribute damage to other aspects of someone’s life, and it is divided into physical and emotional bullying.

Physical bullying can be in the form of hitting, fighting, tripping, showing rude gestures, taking someone else’s things, breaking their things, pushing, and shoving. Meanwhile, emotional bullying includes yelling, name-calling, making fun of someone, leaving people on purpose, laughing at someone, starting rumours, and sending degrading messages.

While it is most common in school, bullying can also take place now anywhere most, especially when there are bullies in the workplace.

Aside from the aforementioned types of bullying, cyberbullying is also common these days as most teens are now using the internet, with some even using the technology to hurt or harm someone online.

Any of these can affect everyone in different ways. But this kind of trait can make an individual or other people feel low whenever a certain toxic person or the bullies in the workplace try to harm them.

If your toxic friends have bullied you, they can affect you by:

  • Making you feel guilty over something you never caused a fuss on. A toxic person tends to put the blame on kind people like you so they can save themselves and let you suffer for them.
  • They can make you feel hopeless and stuck with their toxic trait, and they find it more interesting when you show emotional weakness to them.
  • Once you are bullied, you will feel as if you are alone, and no one is brave enough to stand for you.
  • It can make you see yourself as someone not good enough to fit in. This can also lead you to isolate yourself from anyone else, even to your family.
  • Though there are some people who are not neglecting you, you will feel like as if they are setting you aside now.
  • You are feeling unsafe and afraid most of the time since you fear that something is about to happen again.

 

Meanwhile, bullying at work can make you feel intimated in anything since these bullies in the workplace have a toxic trait that will prevent you from attending meetings, going into the lunchroom, or even attending to most of your company’s functions and events for employees.

In 2017 National Survey on Bullying, workplace bullying “was defined as repeated mistreatment of an employee by one or more employees; abusive conduct that is: threatening, humiliating, or intimidating, work sabotage, or verbal abuse.”

If all these happened, still happening, to you, this is the right time to know why your toxic friends have to do that and know how to deal with them.

Why Do They Bully Other People?

Why Do They Bully Other People

The reason behind a toxic person’s toxic trait varies among the bullies. But most of the time, bullying — most especially the bullies in the workplace — takes place because a toxic person wants to dominate other people so that they can improve their so-called “social status”.

They think that, when they are above anyone else, they can control and manipulate them as long as they want and through the ways they know. But their toxic trait is not a sign of bravery at all. Instead, it is a sign that they have low self-esteem, so they use their toxic trait instead to show their “fake” dominance over other people.

Some of your toxic friends might not also be aware that they are already bullying you or someone already.

This is because some bullies fail to recognize and acknowledge their behaviour toward other people, so they keep on doing the same thing over and over again without realizing that they are already causing distress and anxiety to other people.

Moreover, a toxic person may only bully someone sometimes, specifically when they are feeling angry or frustrated over something. If you can notice, people tend to lose their temper and tend to blurt out hurtful words without noticing that they are already saying something under the belt. Their negative feelings also lead them to search for someone to whom they can vent their feelings.

But the saddest reason they might have is that they, too, were a victim of bullying themselves. Some bullies who are well-built uses their body to bully someone so that they can make themselves look tough and string. Some use their thoughtless words to harm people.

But whatever their means to show their toxic trait, it is important to know that a toxic person is more likely to have lifelong mental and social health issues like depression, anxiety, and aggression.

Believe it or not, they can still prevent such damage from occurring, and there are some ways you follow in dealing with them.

What To Do With The Bullies

 

What To Do With The Bullies

When you feel like you are already hopeless since your toxic friends or bullies surround you in the workplace, know that you can do something to safeguard yourself while helping them to be better at the same time.

Even actor Tom Hiddleston believes that he said before that, “When people don’t like themselves very much, they have to make up for it. The classic bully was actually a victim first”.

Since a toxic person might once be bullied as well, they tend to unleash their emotions but not in the right way. If you want to change your toxic friends’ behaviour, you should practice personal courage first so you can be sure that you can deal with them by showing them that you are not an easy target. 

Because if you look like one, the bully will not go away from you, and it will just encourage them to pester you more. You should also stop tolerating a toxic person’s behaviour by standing for yourself.

But if you think you need more time to learn that, here are the following tips to deal with them while you are learning to stand for yourself.

Do not tolerate them. As we mentioned, you should exercise the way you should talk to the bully to stop their behaviour. You can practice saying it to yourself or a trusted friend, so you can be more comfortable and confident once you try to respond to them.

However, you should keep in mind that you should use the right words to avoid triggering their toxic trait. Instead of telling them, they are mean, you can tell the toxic person of what exactly their behaviour is and how it is impacting your life.

After all, you have the right to be free from any mental, emotional, and physical violence that they are causing.

PT blogger Amy Cooper Hakim tells us, “Bullies lose their power if you don’t cover. Deep down, they doubt they deserve your respect. They admire you for speaking with self-assurance and confidence. So when they bombard, don’t counterpunch. Rather, win them over with your strong, firm, courteous demeanour.

Stay your connections up. While you are experiencing this kind of abuse, you should seek support and help so you will not develop any mental or emotional distress caused by toxic trait Your family and friends will surely make you feel that you are not alone, and you are good enough.

If you have been feeling isolated and powerless due to your toxic friends, maybe it is time for you to protect yourself with the help of other people.

If you are being bullied by the bullies in the workplace, you can tell the human resource department about this since all companies have designed their own response whenever something like bullying happens. They can also give that toxic person a sanction in accordance with their behaviour.

You should learn how to act quickly whenever they are about to bully you again. Most of the time, the longer the time a toxic person gets a hold of you, the more powerful they think they are. In the end, they will hold you even tighter and manipulate you twice as they used to.

If you refuse to tell what is happening to an adult or to someone who has power, you are just letting the aggression to worsen.

If you are being bullied online, you can block the hate messages by blocking its sender. If possible, you can avoid them yourself by deactivating your social networking site account or taking a break for a while. Once the bullying turns into threats or something that calls harm to yourself, you can report it to the police so they can track the IP address of the sender or the website.

Do not blame yourself for their toxic trait. It is not your fault that they end up like that. No matter what the toxic person tells you, you should not forget who you really are and that you are worthy. The bully and their toxic trait is the problem, not you. Remember that there are many wonderful things about you and you are enough.

Do not seek revenge. As much as possible, you should not be a bully yourself. You are more than that, and if you will just give them back what they are giving you, it is not a good idea since they will just notice you more if you get into their nerves.

Prevent communication with them. If you can cut ties with them, do it. There is nothing wrong with taking a break or from running away if you only want to protect your physical, mental, and emotional health.

You must remember that most of the bullies have closed minds, and no matter what you tell them, if they are not willing to change their attitudes, they will remain toxic for the rest of their lives and it is not your problem anymore. This time, you should not be reluctant to give yourself the peace you deserve.

Hoarding Disorder: The Risk Factors of Hoarding That You Should Know

Hoarding Disorder: The Risk Factors of Hoarding That You Should Know

Hoarding is defined as a disorder where a person gathers objects compulsively. People with this condition accumulate excessive amounts of clutter in their homes or offices. They refuse to take them out or dispose of these items, or even consider them trash.

Hoarding is a serious disorder that can have long-term, severe effects on an individual. There are no single quick fixes for this condition, and often, it could lead to severe medical conditions and other complications in the future.

Unfortunately, hoarders tend to hide their hoarding problems. Or, they don’t see their excessive and compulsive hoarding of items as a problem at all. In many cases, the condition has gone untreated for so long that hoarders might have tried and failed, many times over, to deal with it themselves.

People with hoarding problems often felt like there was nothing that could be done for them. That’s why receiving help could be a very rewarding experience for them. When they learn how to deal with their hoarding symptoms, they realize that they’re not alone and that there are different options available.

They might need to make some changes in their lifestyle, and maybe they might need to alter their diet. However, once they’ve received treatment, dealing with their condition could be a whole lot easier.

People often ask about the difference between hoarding and collecting. For the uninitiated, collecting is something people do because they find particular objects interesting or valuable. Collectors often share their passion for collecting certain things, like paintings, stamps, and model cars, with other people. Hoarding, on the other hand, is a disorder that drives people to gather items, without any regard for the items’ value or state, compulsively, and excessively.

Unlike collectors who organize and meticulously takes care of their collections, hoarders usually don’t have any organizational principles. In a typical hoarding situation, objects just pile up.

Also, while collectors love to showcase or flaunt their collections with other people, hoarders tend to be socially reclusive, refusing to leave their homes or communicate with other people. Experts often related this reclusive behavior to the shame or embarrassment hoarders usually feel about their condition.

Sometimes, hoarding is caused by stress, so you should have stress management before you can go deeper to know more about hoarding disorder.

 

  1. Hoarding Symptoms
  2. Why Do People Hoard?
  3. Most Common Items People Hoard
  4. Types of Hoarders
  5. Hoarding Risk Factors and Complications
  6. Other Mental Disorders Associated With Hoarding
  7. How To Help a Hoarder

Hoarding Symptoms

  Hoarding Symptom

The hoarding could be a disorder on its own, or it could be a symptom of another disorder. Instead of making wild guesses about you or your loved one’s condition, it’s still best to seek medical assistance from a licensed physician. Below are some of the general signs, hoarding symptoms, and behavior exhibited by someone with hoarding disorder:

General Signs:

  • Unexplained need to take and keep items, regardless of their value.
  • Difficulty with getting rid of hoarded items.
  • Buying “stock up” or “bargain” things even if there is no apparent need for them.
  • Being engulfed in or feeling overwhelmed by the volume of possessions that have taken over living space.

Hoarding Symptoms:

  • Difficulty with categorizing and organizing possessions.
  • Experiencing functional impairments like social isolation, marital discord, loss of living space, and health hazards, to name a few.
  • Severe anxiety with the thought of throwing away hoarded things.
  • Indecisiveness with what items to keep or where to put them.

Behavior:

  • Withdrawal from family members and friends.
  • Distrust of other people touching or taking away their possessions.
  • Unusual happiness or joy for new hoarded items.
  • Denial of hoarding problem even if it affects his/her life.

Why Do People Hoard?

Since hoarding is not yet fully understood by researchers, the reason behind it remains a mystery. There is still a lot to study and learn about hoarding for us to grasp what it is entirely. Experts deemed it as a complex condition that is difficult to treat. Often, it causes pain and suffering, not just to the person who has it but to his/her loved ones as well.

The hoarding could be a disorder of its own or a symptom of other mental disorders like obsessive-compulsive disorder personality (OCD).

According to Dr. Gregory Jantz, a world-renowned expert on disorders like depression and anxiety, one in four people with obsessive-compulsive disorder personality are also compulsive hoarders. While the real cause behind hoarding is yet to be discovered, Dr. Jantz noted one common reason why people hoard ~ hoarding could relieve anxiety. 

For instance, the more hoarders accumulate items, the more they feel secured. However, hoarding could also generate anxiety at the same time. For example, excessive accumulation of things also makes hoarders feel isolated from the world.

As said, it is unclear why people hoard, but it is often associated with other mental health conditions. To date, researchers are still looking for ways to identify more risk factors associated with hoarding and more effective treatments for it.

Most Common Items People Hoard

Hoarders are known to collect almost all sorts of things. From garbage to high-value items to dead animals. There seems to be no limit to the kind of items a hoarder could collect. But, to give you a clear understanding of what these items are, here’s a list:

  • Boxes
  • Newspapers
  • Bottles
  • Cans
  • Antiques
  • Clothes
  • Trash
  • Dead animals
  • Food waste
  • Vintage items (track tapes, video games, comics, etc.)
  • Books
  • Pieces of furniture (broken or no longer used)

Types of Hoarders

Types of Hoarders

The following are some of the most common types of hoarders:

Shop Hoarders (Compulsive Shopper)

Shop hoarders are people who exhibit signs of chronic shopping. They tend to buy just about anything they lay their hands on. It doesn’t matter what the item is. Even if it has no practical use to shop hoarders, they’ll purchase it and leave it sitting in piles ~ unused. You’ll often discover these unused items still in their original packaging, occupying precious living space.

 

Food Hoarders

Food, even if they are canned or preserved, still have expiration dates. Meaning, at some point in time, they’ll rot and will no longer be edible. Yet, these realities are not enough to stop food hoarders from buying or collecting food. People with this condition often exhibit some type of emotional attachment to food.

Usually, food hoarders continuously buy food and grocery items even if their cupboards, pantries, and refrigerators are brimming with perishable and non-perishable food items. What’s worst is that they hold on to these items even after they expired. Rotten food often attracts disease-carrying rodents and insects, posing a significant health risk to the hoarder and his/her family members.

 

Garbage or Trash Hoarders

Garbage hoarders tend to rummage through other people’s trash and take home what they particularly deemed as “treasures.” They often find it difficult to differentiate what valuable items are from harmful waste. Garbage or trash hoarders are also at high risk of acquiring other diseases due to their hoarding condition. Trash attracts rodents, insects, and different kinds of pests. They either carry viruses harmful to humans, or they could cause significant damage to a home’s structure.

 

Animal Hoarders

There’s a fine line between animal lovers who love to take care of animals and make them their pets and animal hoarders who have no regard for the kind and number of animals they take home and the living space these animals occupy. Animal hoarders often overlook their “pets’” grooming, waste disposal, feeding, pest protection, or well-being in general. This situation often leads to a dirty living environment, not just for the animals but for the hoarder as well. If left unchecked, these “pets” would urinate and defecate anywhere inside the house, which poses another health risk to the house’s residents.

 

Paper Hoarders

Paper hoarding is one of the most common types of hoarding. Paper is the easiest to collect and the fastest to accumulate because it’s available virtually everywhere. Paper hoarders tend to collect excessive amounts of items made of paper. They could be invoices, paper towels, notebooks, magazines, books, coupons, and flyers, to name a few. You’ll often find these stacks of papers in a hoarder’s home, occupying living spaces and blocking walkways. Paper is highly flammable and is hazardous if left unorganized.

Hoarding Risk Factors and Complications

To date, the cause of hoarding is still unknown. However, experts were able to identify several risk factors associated with the said condition. The list includes:

 

  • Having a relative with hoarding disorder. Hoarding often runs in the family. However, researchers are still uncertain whether its hereditary or not. Some scientists believe that a region on chromosome 14 could be compulsive hoarding in families diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder personality.
  • Traumatic loss. Studies revealed that people who experienced traumatic losses in their lives are more likely to develop hoarding disorder. Some people could become hoarders as a way to cope with disturbing experiences like the death of a loved one, divorce, or accident.
  • Other disorders like depressions or obsessive-compulsive disorder. While hoarding could be a condition in its own right, it could also be a symptom of other mental disorders like OCD and depression. Some people diagnosed with obsessive-compulsive disorder personality (OCD) were found to hoard due to obsessive worries or fears.
  • A brain injury that triggered a need to collect and keep things. A traumatic brain injury due to an accident and other incidents could lead to OCD. This situation increases the likelihood of a person who suffered from a brain injury to develop a hoarding disorder to cope with the trauma.
  • Uncontrollable buying habits. Uncontrollable buying habits are usually associated with hoarding disorder. This often shows in people who can’t stop themselves from buying “bargain” or “sale items” even if they don’t need them.
  • Inability to avoid free items like coupons and flyers. Hoarding is also associated with the unexplained need to take free items. This includes free sachets of sugar, coffee, or sauces in restaurants or bath essentials given freely by hotels. Most people with hoarding conditions also have a strong desire to collect groceries and shopping coupons.

Other Mental Disorders Associated with Hoarding

Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD)

Hoarding, particularly food hoarding, is often associated with reactive attachment disorder or RAD. This behavior is not just observed in adults, but in children as well. Children with RAD usually collect, store, and at times, even eat not only food but other strange things. According to research children with RAD hoard food to:

  • Reject their parents or primary caregivers.
  • Gain power over their surroundings.
  • Survive.
  • Show that they don’t trust their parents or primary caregivers.
  • Feed their feeling of entitlement.
  • Mimick other RAD children’s behavior.

 

Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder Personality (OCD)

People with obsessive-compulsive disorder or OCD tend to develop compulsive hoarding. As mentioned earlier, one in four people with obsessive-compulsive disorder personality (OCD) is found to have a hoarding disorder. Often, compulsive hoarding is a result of one’s fear of discarding his/her “treasures.” Just the thought of parting with their possessions could give compulsive hoarders a feeling of incompleteness.

 

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD)

People who have attention deficit hyperactivity disorder or ADHD are also said to be susceptible to hoarding. Some research papers suggest that hoarding could have a stronger connection with ADHD than OCD. ADHD symptoms like distractibility, impulsiveness, and working memory issues could allegedly lead to hoarding.

 

Anxiety Disorder

Hoarding is also associated with anxiety or the body’s natural response to stress. In hoarders, It often manifests as a strong feeling of fear or apprehension about losing their possessions. The hoarding could also make a person feel isolated and uncomfortable in the presence of other people.

 

Alcohol and Drug Addiction

While hoarding has similarities with addiction, like compulsive behavior, isolation, and self-neglect, it is not classified as such. According to experts, addiction is a manifestation of the long-term changes to a person’s brain structure and molecular form. These changes are not observed in hoarders. However, hoarding could lead to drug or alcohol addiction. A person with a hoarding condition tends to self-medicate with drugs and alcohol, further worsening their condition by impairing their cognitive function and ability to make sound decisions.

How to Help a Hoarder

How To Help a Hoarder

While hoarding can be very difficult to deal with, there are many approaches that could help. Before deciding on any type of hoarding disorder treatment for you or your loved one, it’s essential to take a holistic approach first. One thing that you should remember is that you can’t force a hoarder to seek medical help or change his/her lifestyle overnight. But, as per Good Therapy, the following are some of the things that you can do to provide a supportive environment and encourage a hoarder to seek medical help.

 

Respect and Never Take Away a Hoarder’s Possessions

If you think that taking away a hoarder’s possessions is an easy fix, think again because it’s not. Doing so would not only drive the hoarder to distrust you. It could also damage your relationship with that person or cause them emotional distress. Without trust, it would be more challenging to encourage your friend or family member to seek professional help.

 

Educate Yourself About Hoarding Disorder

There’s nothing wrong with trying to help a relative or friend who has a hoarding disorder. However, if you’re not equipped with enough knowledge about the said condition, you might end up emotionally or mentally hurting the person you’re trying to help. You don’t want that to happen, so before making any move, educate yourself by consulting a health professional or reading information from reliable websites.

 

Don’t Enable Hoarding Behavior

As said, you can’t stop a hoarder from collecting unnecessary items. But, you can avoid enabling the behavior. For instance, if your relative or friend is a shop hoarder, don’t invite him/her to go shopping or don’t offer to keep their hoarded items.

 

Recognize Progress, no Matter How Small it is

Taking away hoarded items is often painful and challenging for a hoarder. If ever your relative or friend with hoarding disorder decided to declutter his/her home, the process could be slow and long. However, don’t rush them and make them feel that their small progress doesn’t count. Praise them even for small victories, like throwing away a few items a week.

 

Help Them Clean up or Sort Things out

Sorting stockpiles of hoarded items can be a tiring and difficult task. In some situations, an entire home would be filled with all sorts of items accumulated by the hoarder over time. You may volunteer to help your friend or loved one clean up or organize his/her belongings.

 

Find Hoarding Disorder Treatment

The best help that you could offer is to encourage your loved one to seek hoarding disorder treatment. It’s not always easy, and again, never force your loved one to get one. Instead, you can do some research about potential hoarding disorder treatment providers and recommend them to your relative or friend once he/she is ready.

Self-Care Tips: Things You Can Do To Have Better Life

Self-Care Tips: Things You Can Do To Have Better Life

Everyone in this world seeks to have a better life as we grow older. As time passes by, growing healthy became one of our priorities in life though we are surrounded by several things that cause stress every day. What we can do to promote healthy functioning while growing healthy is to enhance our well-being by learning and practicing self-care.

Maybe you are trying to ask yourself what it means to take care of yourself. Sometimes, self-care means choosing yourself over the things that exhaust you, whether it is the job you have been trying to quit for months or years now or the relationship you have been trying to end since it no longer makes you happy. But to be honest, self-care is more than managing and ending your stress before you can live your best life ever.

According to a 2017 journal article titled, “Development of a Self-Care Assessment for Psychologists,” self-care is defined as, “a multidimensional, multifaceted process of purposeful engagement in strategies that promote healthy functioning and enhance well-being.”

It means that there are several self-care routines and self-care tips you can follow to exercise and take care of yourself while growing healthy. At some point, self-care means stepping back when you feel like the things around you are not going according to your plan. So instead of losing them all, you should take a break and develop self-care routines to help yourself get back in track. That way, you will also be preventing the possibility of having a burnout.

However, most of the time, some people are getting too desperate to experience the best in life that they fail to notice how not everything that feels go is self-care. One should be aware that over-eating, alcohol and drug abuse, and risk-taking are some of the things that will never do something good in them.

These, obviously, are not self-care activities but rather a set of self-destructive tasks. Though the aforementioned activities can somehow make your challenging emotions a little bearable, the relief they can bring is temporary and they can even cause long term problems.

As the name implies, self-care is a personal matter, and people’s approach to it will always be different. In this article, we will let you know about some of the benefits once you follow your own self-care routines.

You can read our article, “Stressful Life? Why It Is Important To Take A Break” to know the connection between taking a break and learning self-care. Once you understand all its aspects, you will surely no longer have to waste your time getting stressed always.

 

  1. Benefits of Self Care
    • You can be more productive.
    • You will be growing healthy and resistant to diseases.
    • You will boost your self-esteem.
    • You will learn more about yourself.
  2. What You Can Do To Practice Self Care
    • Prioritize Sleep As Part Of Your Self Care Routine
    • Exercise Daily
    • Eat Right, Live Right
    • Take a Self-Care Break

1. Benefits of Self Care

Benefits of Self Care

There are a lot of self-care activities that you can do to enjoy the benefits afterward. According to Living Self Care, this tends to improve people’s way of living — physically, emotionally, socially, and mentally. To understand more about these benefits, here are some of it which you can experience once you follow self-care tips.

 

You can be more productive.

To make your body run actively and efficiently, you should know that there is a massive connection between your physical and mental aspects. That means that when you take care of your mind, you will do better, too. Growing healthy and doing some physical care means that you are into fueling your body by giving yourself a proper rest every day.

When you care for your physical needs, you should be checking whether you are getting enough sleep, if you are eating healthy foods in the most ideal way, and if you are doing enough exercise, to name a few.

 

You will be growing healthy and resistant to diseases.

Chronic diseases are now the leading cause of deaths and disabilities all over the globe. The World Health Organization has been actively promoting self-care tips and self-care routines that are related to one’s health. It includes health promotion, disease prevention, and self-medication.

Self-care is truly important most especially if you want to manage your chronic illness or prevent one from occurring. Instead of depending on your attending physician all the time, everyone should learn how to take care of themselves by following this physical-related self-care tips. One, to avoid disease and to continue growing healthy, you should avoid smoking and at least consume alcohol moderately.

If would be best to wholly remove alcohol out of your system, but you can get rid of it slowly. You should also opt to consume healthy food and check for the most ideal healthy diet for your body. Lastly, managing stress must be achieved while engaging yourself in regular exercise.

 

You will boost your self-esteem.

When you put yourself first and begin to prioritize yourself, it will be the beginning of you boosting your self-esteem since you will feel happier, more balanced, and more satisfied. You will also start developing a relationship with yourself which you have been ignoring for years now since you are too busy with something else.

There are a lot of people who suffer from low esteem and it eventually leads to mental health issues like depression, anxiety, and even simple sadness.

Having a self-care routine that will help you avoid the things that can make you feel mentally and physically exhausted can also boost your self-worth. Once you made it there, you will continuously have higher self-love, self-confidence, and self-esteem.

 

You will learn more about yourself.

You will surely know more about your self worth due to numerous self-care activities you have been doing for years, and it is a good start before you can try learning about your loved ones, too.

Learning about yourself while growing healthy means you must understand what makes you a different person. It is a must to explore what your heart really wants since it is a great step to build a connection with your soul. And let me assure you, you will not ever regret getting familiar with the person inside you. 

Learning about yourself is beyond discovering what your favorites are, but it is a process of understanding what you really want to do while going more in-depth to make a stronger connection with yourself. It is about knowing about your insecurities and flaws and accepting it all instead of feeling shy about it. That is why you will be sure that you are growing healthy and living your life the way you want to. 

In order to continuously practice self-care, here are some self-care routines and tips you can add to your self-care activities.

2. Prioritize Sleep As Part Of Your Self Care Routine

ritize Sleep As Part Of Your Self Care Routine

According to the University Health Services of the University of California, though researchers do not know exactly how much sleep adults need, some data suggest that 7-8 hours per 24-hour period is the most satisfactory amount. Generally, the amount of sleep required is an individual matter.

Some people feel rested after 5 to 6 hours of sleep; others sleep 9-10 hours. Most adults sleep about 7-8 hours in 24 hours. Children sleep more than adults, and, in most cases, the elderly sleep less than they did as younger adults.

Prioritizing sleep and adding it to your self-care activities does not only make you energetic every time you wake up in the morning. Allowing yourself to rest will bring you a long term effect of making your body strong enough to defend yourself in a lot of diseases.

But you should also take note that you should practice good night’s sleep healthily. Some people take sleeping pills as an answer. However, they might cause more harm since it changes your body’s normal sleeping period by attacking your nervous system.

You can just resolve this by observing your behavior patters and refusing to do some insomnia-causing behaviors:

  • Getting up and falling asleep at different times every day
  • Taking too much nap
  • Sleeping inside the unideal environment
  • Too much caffeine intake before going to bed
  • Stirring your strong emotions before your sleeping schedule.

Growing healthy and practicing self-care is only possible if you follow self-care tips correctly and healthily.

 

Exercise Daily

Exercise DaiExercise Daily

As part of your self-care routines, doing exercises every day, just like what we have mentioned, is the ultimate form of self-care. It is solely because physical activities do affect not only our physical aspect but also our mental and emotional health.

By engaging yourself at least in low to moderate activities, you are also improving your overall mood by reducing stress. As you do those workouts, you are also releasing your body’s exhaustion which triggers abnormal heart rate, difficulty in breathing, and more.

This activity can actually send signals to your brain to increase its capacity to handle stress. This can also help you achieve the first one, which is to give yourself a better sleep since exercising reduces your anxiety and stress, which can help you to have a better sleep.

 

Eat Right, Live Right

Eat Right, Live Right

One of the self-care tips you should always follow if to eat right since giving yourself proper nutrition since it is the core component of your well-being.

According to Rachel Kelly, a mental health advocate and the author of The Happiness Diet, “Our digestive health and nutritional health affects our brain health. So for us to follow the self-care activities we have created for ourselves, we must have nutrition strategies as well since there is a “wonder” that food can do to make us live a healthier and healthy life. For example, you should follow a certain diet wherein you consume a lot of fruits and vegetables to continuously promote positivity in your health.

If possible, you should avoid restricting yourself from getting the right nourishment. You should not think of how your jeans can still fit in since it is your nutrition and health that are currently on the line. To help you realize the importance of making yourself feeling satisfied, imagine this: you are on a diet and you get the ideal body that you want. But after a few days, your body fat comes back.

Now the question is, is the dieting you are doing making you happy? Promoting self-care in terms of food and nutrition means cleansing detoxifying your body as dieting too much can only cause more stress. Proper fueling is the correct answer here.

 

Take a Self-Care Break

Take a Self-Care Break

Giving yourself a break while growing healthy can definitely contribute to more effective self-care routines. If you think that you are getting too hard on yourself since you are not the best in something, then you are just putting more guilt and adding more stress to your body.

This time, you need to stop for a while and prioritize yourself. You cannot always say “yes” then discover afterward that that particular favor is not actually in line with your self-care activities.

You can pause and be mindful of taking care of yourself throughout the day since you truly deserve a decompression after a long tiring day.

Sometimes, instead of focusing too much in your professional life or school, you need to practice breathing exercises instead and give yourself some time to accomplish everything that is written on your vacation and leisure list. You should try adding your hobbies and interests in your self-care routines, so in the end, you will have a better life compared to the one you had before.

Toxic Positivity: How You Can Love Yourself Truly While Growing Healthy

Toxic Positivity: How You Can Love Yourself Truly While Growing Healthy

People always want to start their days with a positive quote from a random personality or popular figure. They tend to do it so since they want a mantra which they can follow throughout the day. Looking at the brighter side seem to be the only way to show how much you love yourself, but let me warn you: not all positivities can bring a positive effect to your life.

Being positive sometimes may be essential, but toxic positivity is something you should avoid. As what the words say, toxic positivity is a way of seeing things positively but we are unaware that it is even a toxic move. The concept of it is thinking that you are growing healthy and every little thing you do is positive enough to establish your life.

However, everything becomes toxic when you totally focus on positive thoughts and rejecting anything that will trigger those negative emotions a person should typically be feeling.

While it is essential to stay positive, toxic positivity happens when you ignore or shrug off negative vibes and unpleasant emotions. If you fail to notice them, you are just making them even bigger.

As they remain unprocessed and unnoticed, those emotions will become bigger and bigger until they are too much not to be noticed and too hard to be resolved.

When you let toxic positivity reign in your life, you are losing your chance to give yourself relate to what others are going through right now. If that is the case, it can make you look less approachable and not relatable at all, causing them to lose interest in your existence. 

Accepting negativities, of course, can definitely make us feel bad about it. But facing the emotions you are most afraid about will teach you how to cope with it until you can handle it while eliminating its occurrence little by little. After all, bringing your burdens off your shoulders and chest is way easier than pretending like everything is still okay and not falling apart.

Our emotions are not there to scare us or harm us. Instead, they occur to give us hints on how our brains would like to respond to the events happening around us. It is not always about looking at the silver linings in life. If you want to learn how to truly love yourself, you should know that your human brain does not work that way.

To help you out, we will teach you the simple things you can do to love yourself without practising toxic positivity.

But before you can continue, you can read “How Emotional Intelligence Plays HUGE Role In Healthy Relationships” to know more about emotional intelligence which you can also apply to yourself. In that write-up, you will discover how EQ is more important than IQ, and how low emotional intelligence can affect your healthy relationships as well as your other social relationships.

 

Understand Yourself

Understand Yourself

Growing healthy means choosing to love yourself first. And in order to do that, you must talk to yourself first so you can be able to understand what is going through your mind. There is so much advice our families and friends have to offer. However, you should realize that your life is your life, not theirs. Your life is something only you can manage and understand — your actions, words, and everything that is happening around you.

When it comes with understanding yourself, your thoughts are the only things that matter. The way you do that explains how much you take care and love yourself healthily. If there are types of relationships that will need you to consult other people first, in this one, you need to love yourself first by listening and understanding yourself through ups and downs. If you are happy, sad, angry, or frustrated, you should learn how to manage yourself and those feelings without depending on anyone else.

You see, when you begin to love yourself, growing healthy will never be a problem anymore. Your own senses will send you signals that can surely help you get through with anything. Once you learned to do that, you will see more as you take notice of everything you do and everyone around you. You will also learn that little by little, those things that are once blurry to you will finally be more apparent.

To start understanding yourself, you might do the following tips every day:

  • Give yourself a good rest. I know you are aware that your brain cannot work correctly if your body is too exhausted to translate the signal. So taking a break to shoo away toxic positivity out of your life is a must. You can have a ten-minute break whenever you accomplish something, or you can achieve that 8-hour sleep every night.
  • Give yourself a treat by eating healthy. You can refer to our articles titled “5 Healthy Diet Tips That Can Boost Your Immunity During Coronavirus Outbreak” and “7 Healthy Foods For All Diet Types That Can Help You Add MORE Weight” to get some tips about healthy eating.
  • Taking a break is essential most especially when you want to offer yourself some space to boost your spiritual aspect. For another set of tips, you can read “Stress Management: Here’s How You Can Deal With Work Burnouts”. This one primarily tackles taking a break from work. In this article, you will learn how to manage your stress and the things you should to regain your balance once again.
  • Exercise regularly. To love yourself is to take care of your physical aspects. Make sure you dedicate a few minutes of your day getting active.

According to Vitae Realising The Potential of Researchers’ website, you should understand yourself bu realizing your talents. And you can do it by asking:

  • Think about significant points of achievement or challenge in your life to date
  • Why are they significant?
  • What have you learned from them, and how might they influence the type of career path you pursue?

Open Your Heart

Open Your Heart

If you want to love yourself, you must learn to open up yourself first. Accepting that you are not perfect instead of pretending that you are perfect can help you in growing healthy enough to love yourself. When you acknowledge your emotions, your lapses, and mistakes, then you will surely have to reach a higher level of self-care and self-love while eliminating toxic positivity.

To do this, you may retrace your childhood to find the best lessons in your life. Understanding every negative emotion, your lows, and the shameful words and deeds you did before but regretting now is the best way to open your heart little by little. This way, you might also be able to accept the things that caused you to close your heart before and find out how some of them might be a victim of your false understandings. Expanding your mental capacity is also another thing you can do to love yourself. Maybe you see the world differently since you saw the wrong in them.

However, if you can recall, it only worsened because you failed to notice it. So one way you can do to fix it is to learn from your past and not shutting your door anymore. This is the only way out to release yourself from the hurtful truths that have been confining you for years now. This is how you can escape from your emotional problems to be able to deal with your current emotions now.

Maybe, you closed your heart because of something that happened a long time ago, but you still have a hard time letting them go, or perhaps you just do not want to accept the truth about it. Once you learn how to accept your pain and mistakes, you will discover that too much optimism does not exist at all. If you choose to conceal your negative emotions, you are just ignoring a part of yourself, and it is not a healthy way to live yourself.

We know that growing up, you have always wanted to learn how to love yourself first. But you should know by now but we all have a dark side and it only takes honesty to yourself to accept all of that. Forgive yourself for everything that happened in the past that caused you to feel that way, and embrace the fact that you can no longer be changed what happened but you can still do better next time by learning from it. Make no room for jealousy, that way you will succeed and love yourself more.

Be Grateful

Be Grateful

While growing up, I refused to have toxic positivity. Instead, I looked at the negative things and learned from it, then I convinced myself that something good would happen once I understood that. Being grateful over everything that happened to you is something you can learn while growing healthy, and it can shape your mindset and attitude into a powerful one — powerful enough to teach you how to forgive and love yourself.

Scott H. Young, the author of the book “Ultralearning” said, “If you want to make any improvement in your life, you must first accept the way it is now. Don’t try to judge it and make it wrong. Don’t try to glorify it or distort the truth to make it more attractive. Just accept the way things are.”

He added that personal improvement occurs when a person acknowledges their current situation and finds pain in it. That is because extreme pain can push people to do something about it, and no matter what the ending would be, they will still learn something from it.

Harvard Medical School’s Health Publishing published “6 ways to use your mind to control pain” under Harvard Women’s Health Watch. In 2015, they listed that mind-body therapies for yourself can help you get through the pain.

“I tend to think of these techniques as similar to flavours in an ice cream store. Depending on your mood, you might want a different flavour of ice cream—or a different technique,” Dr Ellen Slawsby, an assistant clinical professor of psychiatry at Harvard Medical School who works with patients at the Benson-Henry Institute, said. “Practicing a combination of mind-body skills increases the effectiveness of pain relief.”

In order to prevent toxic positivity, these are the things they advised people like you to do when they want to love yourself first.

  • Take a deep breath. It has always been a technique to calm yourself down while giving yourself time to internally ask your body how it is doing. Breathing in peace and exhaling your tension and stress can help you get your body back to the rhythm.
  • Find the best relaxation response. When you are stressed, your heart rate gets faster and it puts your body on high alert. To contradict this, you should learn how to focus on deep breathing and maintaining a good oxygen level of your body.
  • Once you finish your breathing exercises, you can now start listening to more calming music that can continuously maintain your body’s good rhythm.
  • To love yourself is to offer something that will surely make your day enjoyable. You can opt to read or write stories and poetries, walk and reconnect with nature, cook your favourite dish, and more. Practising how your emotions respond when you are doing this, and that can remove toxic positivity in all aspects of your life.

Reality is neither good nor bad. There is an old Buddhist saying, “There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way.” To love yourself is to allow yourself to see both big and small pictures and overcoming the challenges in life. You do not need to complain anything about your struggles because that is what can make you stronger and healthier. And once you champion all of that, I assure you that you will feel life’s satisfaction you have always been waiting for.

10 Easy Foods To Eat When You Are On Diet

10 Easy Foods To Eat When You Are On Diet

Losing weight is never an easy task to begin with, but we always push harder to achieve the ideal weight we have still been hoping to have. We tend to search for some tips online or buy a diet tips book to keep ourselves guided as we choose one from the diet types stated on them.

Some people start dieting because they feel pressured to lose weight. So as much as possible, they refuse to tale a diet to gain weight and opt for something that can slash their body fats instead. However, some diet types are unhealthy and not suitable for them, so it is a must to seek medical advice if you want to push yourself and go on extremes just to attain a goal. 

But you must keep in mind how some diet types can be unhealthy. For example, since our bodies need enough calories to run well continuously, you must search for natural foods to digest rather than lessening your calorie intake. Extreme low-fat diets can be harmful most, primarily when they do not supply you with the nutrients you are supposed to be feeding your system. If that continues, you will not get the vitamins and minerals you need, and it will surely not work for you for a long time.

There are some ways to keep your weight in the quietest state, and these diet types are healthy. Aside from regular exercise, eating a variety of natural foods and healthy diet recipes can make you feel healthier and better about yourself. Instead of eating unhealthy foods, we have listed the best natural food below that can help you maintain your weight. 

But before we proceed, we would like to share that it is dangerous to continue your diet if you are not overweight. Maybe you should just find the right food for you.

To help you, even more, you can read our article, “9 Foods To Eat To Slow Aging Process,” so you can look even younger while trying the following natural foods when you are on a diet.

 

  1. Whole Eggs
  2. Salmon
  3. Leafy Vegetables
  4. Chicken Breast and Lean Beef
  5. Tuna
  6. Boiled Potato
  7. Avocado
  8. Apple Cider Vinegar
  9. Chia Seeds
  10. Whole Grains

Whole Eggs

Whole Eggs

If you look in the diet types of a person who is losing weight, maybe you will see that they opt to have a low carb diet. And to achieve that, they consume whole eggs instead of white eggs. That is because an egg is small in calories, and it has a dietary fat that can slow down your body’s way of absorbing protein. That way, you will feel fuller for a more extended period, preventing you from chowing down more food from time to time.

Aside from not being one of the natural foods to digest, eggs are also responsible for producing amino acids that can help you in bodybuilding due to their essential nutrients? But if you do not want to diet to gain weight, you should consume the whole egg instead of getting only the white part and discarding the yolks. Its white portion is affluent in protein, while the rest of the vitamins and minerals you can get are already present in the egg, including vitamins B2, B12, and D plus iron.

A study conducted at the University of Connecticut found that the fat present in egg yolks helps to reduce the bad cholesterol from the body. That means you will be safe from chronic diseases like heart disease and stroke. There is also a diet type called egg diet, which allows you to eat only eggs throughout the day.

Salmon

Salmon

One of the most popular diet types in the world is the salmon diet. Though it is not a weight loss plan, it is also not a diet to gain weight, but a diet to maintain your pounds while having radiantly beautiful skin.

Perricone’s diet urges people to have at least two to three servings of salmon every day. According to Dr. Nicholas V. Perricone, assistant clinical professor at Yale Medical School and author of the New York Times bestseller The Wrinkle Cure (AOL Time Warner), this diet type is the tastiest and most inexpensive way to have a facelift treatment.

But aside from its weight-maintaining and beauty lift powers, salmon is also an excellent choice to keep your heart, brain, and bones healthy. While it is not a magical loss regime, it is high in protein and can help those people who want to slim down their bodies. There is also some evidence that consuming protein-rich foods may burn more calories while preserving your muscles and burning your fat.

Leafy Vegetables

Leafy Vegetables

Some of the diet types might require you to go green ultimately. However, you can achieve what a vegan can make if you will add leafy vegetables to your diet. In general, if you want to zone in on heavyweights, you can consume more and deeper green veggies and let them become your nutritional bank.

One of the reasons why leafy veggies are natural foods to digest is that though they are deficient in calories, they are still packed with nutrients that can burn your extra fats. Its nitrites have always been the key to converting your white cells from fat-storing to fat-burning ability.

If you are not a fan of salad but still want to try tasting leafy vegetables as one of the natural foods to digest, you can try having a smoothie by mixing the following:

  • 1 1/2 cups coconut water
  • One ripe avocado
  • Four kale leaves
  • One celery stalk
  • 1 cup of frozen mango cubes
  • Two tablespoons ground flaxseed
  • One tablespoon honey
  • One teaspoon fresh ginger

Just put these inside your blender and blend everything, and you can finally have another taste of it!

Chicken Breast and Lean Beef

Chicken Breast Lean Beef

These two natural foods to digest can be your answers in maintaining your diet if you consume them alternately.

For lean beef or any kind of red meat, it has low to moderate carbs diet types that you can follow to lose your weight or maintain it. It consists of essential vitamins and minerals that are responsible for producing your body with iron, zinc, and Vitamin B12. However, it is still necessary to choose the right part of the beef if you want to lose weight, so make sure you always purchase lean meat.

Lean parts only have 4 grams of fat per 100 grams, preventing you from consuming more fats. Also, you should watch the amount of red meat you are eating to avoid turning it into a diet to gain weight. You can consume a small amount of it a couple of times per week so you can ensure that you can achieve your goal.

For chicken breast, you can get more protein while having only a small amount of calories. However, you should not consume this every day to be able to balance your diet.

Tuna

Tuna

Among all the diet types in the world, tuna diet offers a three-day diet type, which was designed by Dave Draper to turn on your body’s fat loss mode. By consuming tuna for three days, it can make you lose your water weight while boosting your metabolism and building your muscle mass.

Since the tuna diet is a high protein, low carb, and low calorie, you can keep your cravings alive and protect the body from having a shock. If you want to try the tuna diet plan, you may refer to the instructions on this link and do it for three to 30 days to see visible but short-term results. You can also try using this to your healthy diet recipes to add more twists.

Boiled Potato

Boiled Potato

If french fries are part of a diet to gain weight, the boiled version of it can make you lose it. A high number of people who are searching for diet types opt to consume boiled potatoes since it does the same job as eggs. You can also experience such rapid weight loss if you eat nothing for a day but plain potatoes. You will inevitably lose nearly half a kilogram!

If you want to try this diet, you must follow these instructions:

Rule 1. For three to five days, you should only consume plain and cooked potatoes. These potatoes should weigh around 2–5 pounds (0.9–2.3 kg) each day.

Rule 2. You cannot eat them with condiments. Avoid turning it into french fries by dipping them to ketchup, butter, sour cream, and cheese.

Rule 3. You can add some salt, but you must avoid it as much as possible.

Rule 4. For drinks, you can only have water, plain tea, or black coffee.

Avocado

Avocado

Foods that are high in fat or fiber can make you feel like you are always full. Though avocado is included in the natural meals to digest list, it has a strong effect in making you feel more satisfied after eating it.

In some studies, they have been stating that if a person eats avocado, they will no longer have a strong feeling or desire to eat for longer hours, and cravings will not be possible. With this, you will inevitably affect your appetite as you will control your food intake more, especially when you already feel full.

Aside from losing weight, avocado can also maintain your current weight without compromising your health. Compared to those who refuse to eat this, people who add avocado to their desired diet types have a lower risk of having a high body weight. This also has so many qualities of a weight loss-friendly foods, so you must add this to your natural meals to digest list.

Apple Cider Vinegar

Apple Cider Vinegar

Apple cider vinegar is more famous for preventing and curing gout and other bone-related diseases by lowering blood sugar levels and uric acid. But aside from this ability, this can also be added to your water to maintain your weight.

This liquid has acetic acid that quickly dissolves into acetate and hydrogen that can promote weight loss. This can also reduce your body’s fan storage –specifically your belly and liver fat.

It can also quickly burn your fat and prevent more fat buildup by suppressing your appetite. With this benefit alone, you can be sure that you will see visible effects once you mix this at least to your water.

Chia Seeds

Chia Seeds

Have you seen those easy foods to digest in the market? Some of them have these tiny little black seeds that look like small eyes when you take a closer look. But these little eyes called chia seeds can actually be your key to lose weight.

Each seed of this contains high fiber and protein that can quickly suppress your appetite and make you feel full for hours. Since it still has a low calorie, chia seeds can also serve as your low-calorie snack.

Moreover, they have the ability to absorb fats 10 times to their actual weight. Aside from being weight friendly. It can also slow down the absorption of sugar into your bloodstream, preventing blood sugar spikes that are not helpful to your health status.

Whole Grains

Whole Grains

For years, whole grains have proven their capacity to boost a person’s metabolism while giving enough nutrients to your body. You should know the difference between whole grains and refined grains, and how the first type of grain significantly improve your fiber intake while adding more nutrients to your body.

If you are familiar with breakfast cereals, some of these natural foods to digest are made out of whole grains, so it can indeed reduce your risk of being overweight or obese. If you also get the right amount of portion size, you will have a smaller waist circumference in no time.

Growing Healthy: How To Establish Good and Healthy Relationships

Growing Healthy: How To Establish Good and Healthy Relationships

As we grow older, we aim to have nothing but healthy relationships because these people are the ones we will spend the rest of our lives with them. To have healthy relationships mean growing healthy, so keeping them close to us is as essential as taking care of ourselves.

Just like the way you built yourself over the past years, establishing a relationship with other people can also take time if you want it to be healthy and strong.

If you have experienced failed relationships in the past, you will know how a single problem can cause a time bomb to explode, as if it is just waiting for a small mistake before a person tells you that taking a break might be the best thing than being with you.

Of course, hearing those words can hurt you. But you will know who created the lapses and who overlooked them. After all, loving someone is like riding on a seesaw — it will never work if there is no one sitting at the other end of it. It is essential to know when to pull and push, and to realize when everything is already too much. When that happens, taking a break might be the only option you should face.

We all want to avoid that and safeguard all the relationships we have. Not because we already have invested our time, efforts, and commitment to them, but because we know our lives will never be the same again once we lost them. So to keep the fire burning, we will let you know through this article how you can keep your healthy relationships without taking a break.

Before we proceed, you may try reading “How Emotional Intelligence Plays HUGE Role In healthy relationships.” In that article, more knowledge of how your emotions can prevent you from always saying goodbye when you can still save previous relationships.

 

  1. Make Time For Each Other
  2. Stay Connected
  3. Understand That There Is Always Ups and Downs

Make Time For Each Other

Make Time For Each Other

Time truly is something you want to invest in if you are going to experience growing healthy, and it is the same as investing it on to create healthy relationships.

Falling in love and listening to your partner are complementary ways to keep your relationship burning. Sometimes, the things you did during your first date is exciting anymore since you failed to remember how it made you feel during the first time.

Time plays a vital role in creating healthy relationships since, as we grow older, we tend to focus on working so hard to be the best versions of ourselves. We divide our time alone with our families, friends, and loved ones. But as years go by, we will find it hard to find time together again, most notably when you two are already preparing to settle down.

But it is reasonable, isn’t it? To sacrifice what you have today to have a better future together. If the two of you share the same high level of emotional intelligence, then you will surely get through this together. Growing healthy with your partner contributes to the version of you when you are growing up. As long as you understand each other’s sacrifices, then you two are still good.

Also, some couples still prefer face-to-face interaction and communication rather than virtual messaging. If you can notice, younger generations nowadays opt to talk using texts, emails, social networking sites, and other internet-related communication.

Though these are all instant, it is still essential to exchange your stories in person as it can strengthen your relationships. Using too many devices also does not have many positive impacts on yourself and the nervous system, and worst, it can lead to more severe health problems.

It is okay to exchange your “I love yous” and other sweet messages via text or voice messages, but nothing can still beat if you will express your feelings in a person. If you continue to distance yourself with this, taking a break might be your next step. This is because they no longer feel like you understand them or appreciate them, so your ending might be more likely a disconnected couple.

No matter how busy you are, taking care of each other, as well as your emotional and mental health, is essential in growing healthy together.

You can set a regular time to see each other and go on a date, or you can also have at least one day per week where you can put your electronic devices down and focus on your partners. You can also reserve a day where you can spend it on enjoying your hobbies together, or probably a simple walk to the park is already okay.

The most important thing about staying close and having healthy relationships is how you stay focus without breaking the fun. Sure, being earnest is a must, but you two still need to exchange laughs from time to time. Keeping your sense of humor can ease away your anxiety and stress, and that will surely connect the two of you more.

Stay Connected

Stay Connected

Aside from time, constant communication will help you prevent taking a break from each other. When growing up, we always feel the need to share our feelings and thoughts.

In relationships, having excellent communication brings positive emotional connection since you let your partner relate themselves to you, and they do the same in return. Practicing constant contact will work your healthy relationships through without taking a break due to the problems you are facing.

Since you are in a relationship, your partner serves as your best friend, as well.

You can tell them anything that you want to say to them, be it your worst day at work or in school, tell them about the traffic and how it got you late. You can tell them how you are craving for this and for that, or you can also inform them that your favorite Netflix series just ended. You see, being open makes healthy relationships, and that is what we want.

After all, loving someone should provide comfort and understanding to both parties to achieve goring healthy. To attain this, you must be a good listener whenever your partner has something to say. That way, you can make them feel valued while showing them that you are not just hearing them, but listening to them, as well.

Jon Kabat-Zin wrote in his book “Wherever You Go There You Are,” these are the tips to become a better listener.

 

  • Put yourself inside the mind of the speaker.
  • Listen for meaning.
  • Pay attention to body language.
  • Cultivate empathy.
  • Avoid making judgments.
  • Look into others’ eyes when they’re speaking.
  • Pay attention to the feelings associated with the words.
  • Notice the speaker’s tone and inflection.
  • Repeat in your own words what someone has told you (empathetic reflection).
  • Acknowledge that you’re listening by nodding or saying, “Uh-huh.”
  • Occasionally summarize others’ comments when given a chance.

 

But if you are too stressed to stay connected, you should let your partner know about it so you will not leave anywhere hanging. Remember, they are your partner, and whatever that is going through your mind should be known to them so that they can help you out and try to make things better for you instead of taking a break away from them.

That way, you will be calmer as you try to avoid regretting those things that will occur during your misunderstandings and conflicts.

Understand That There Is Always Ups and Downs

Understand That There Is Always Ups and Downs

healthy relationships are not a straight line, indeed. Each one of them experiences downs, and that what makes the connection between two people deeper.

Growing healthy means knowing that there is no perfect person in healthy relationships no matter how durable and robust the two people are. Each one of us has our own flaws, and it might cause us to have downtime with our partners sometimes.

Temporarily taking a break by parting ways might help you, but it is still better if you can fix it together most especially when you convince yourself that you two are a team. You will not always fall on the same page.

If you have something on your mind that stresses you, it is certain that he is experiencing the same feeling but due to different reasons, instead.

In a study conducted by Guy Bodenmann of the University of Zurich and Ashley Randall, they stated in the article “Current Opinion in Psychology” that “Stress — the physical or psychological reaction to real or imagined demands — is embedded within our social context, and can impact the ways in which we interact with others, specifically our romantic partner.

While some individuals may face increased experiences of stress due to personality traits, such as neuroticism, or mental health conditions, such as diagnosed anxiety or depression, the focus of this manuscript is to present a review of associations between stress and romantic partners’ relationship satisfaction irrespective of these individual differences.”

When growing up, you should teach yourself the fact that there are a lot of stressors surrounding even the healthy relationships so it is important to cope with stress and not vent it with your partner — though it seems like the easiest thing to do. There are healthier ways to manage your feelings, specifically your anger, stress, and frustration.

However, you should know when a solution is healthy or not so you can avoid adding more fuel to the problem. The most important thing to do here is to continue to move forward together while looking for the perfect solutions to get through the rough spots.

Remembering what you have been gone through can also help you calm down. By imagining those happy memories and thinking about your future together, you will find more courage to immediately look for a solution so you can continue growing healthy together.

Drifting apart or taking a break is never a solution here if you want your relationship to last for a long time — or forever.

When you commit mistakes, you should be humble enough to admit it and do something to fix this. Changing for the better will not hurt you. In fact, that is what makes healthy relationships stronger. Your pride has no place here if you aim to be with that person.

If you really want to spend the rest of your life with them, make sure that when growing up, you take note of the bad habits that you have and adapt some changes to improve yourself. If you need to seek someone else’s help and advice, it is alright since therapy can help you a lot.

There are some things in your relationship that, sometimes, are becoming too toxic and overwhelming to handle. There are some love experts, or even your parents, who know better and can give you a concrete answer to fix your relationship.

There is no need to be shy if you only want the best things to happen. Your downfall is your partner’s downfall, too, and you should work harder to get back up together stronger.

Remember, it is normal to have ups and downs, and you should embrace that instead of sacrificing healthy relationships by suddenly taking a break. Not all relationships are 100 percent alright all the time. You must remember that you are in a relationship with an individual, and they are still trying their best to do everything just to achieve everything by growing healthy like you.

Disagreements should never be a reason for you to quit, and it is only possible if you keep yourself to each other burning. Respect each other when you are happy, when you are sad. Respect each other’s feelings when you are angry, or when you are too tired to deal with anything else.

Remember that once you said something negative, they will remember that forever, and you cannot take them back anymore. But the most important thing to have healthy relationships is to forgive, every time, even if you think they do not deserve it.